From time to time
I go looking
For a wrench
To throw
At me
To break
My heart
For a reminder
I go looking
From time time to time
Tag Archives: Heartbreak
Independence Eve: A Haiku
Last time my heart’ll fall
Dogs in the night, breaking in
Last time, I promise
Slander: A Haiku
I’m hurting today
There’ll be heart-stains everywhere
If I’m not silent
******************
Some bowl of cherries
Is what I’ll focus upon
Some new day ahead
In Our Fifties
Our chartreuse-colored love
The ugly chair now, that we don’t wish to sit in or admit brought comfort, respite
Nor will we throw it away
We mourn it in the kitchen like a death
Seemingly forever, while surrounded with casseroles of comfort food brought to us by well-meaning “friends”
We watch it as an epic film of someone else’s life
Sitting in the dark, screaming at the screen, warning of their err, fall from grace, then trauma
We escape it with our wanderlust-filled travels near and far
Photographing nature, plus wild wildlife who in-turn, chase us as we sleep, pseudo-nightmares that wake us at 3am
We do this
You, there, and me, here
Silk and brocade-covered hardwood frames we were and we are
Camaraderie and adventure that was to have brought us peace
Closure to the aching
What color was it initially, before the fade, we ask ourselves over and over
What we know for certain — it was an heirloom love
Before the spit up and sweaty workaday clothes soiled it
Before the pained animals in us tore it to shreds
Before our childhood loneliness, unresolved, relegated us to our corners in our fifties — upper lips bloodied, both of us
Walking attachment disorders, detached by default, from each other
All in one, single day
Eventually, we go to the curb with this shredded chartreuse thing
Pack up and move far away
Looking from the rear-view mirror at what was, we draw others’ ire as we drive too-slow down that road
It is always dusty Summer in our hearts’ mind’s eye
Fix-it Man
I tried, I swear I tried
To stop loving the Blue Mountains you swept me away to
To stop seeing them through your grey-green eyes
I prayed endlessly
Extend your hand once more to me down those towered hiking trails
Let me see heaven in your saunter again
I allowed foreign kisses
Fill this Orion-shaped wound, I vowed — still I stand, hollow
Waiting for your fix, for our paths to merge as you promised
Lost Lover: A Haiku
Song I wanna send
To ears these lips cannot reach
Talkin’ about heav’n
Bad Actors
So there he was
That three-plus decades-old ghost of a love-of-my-life
Did we frolic and promise
I can’t say
Because suddenly, there he wasn’t
Did I wail, unrelenting
Did I bargain
You’re proof of said sale
Virtual man
Band-aid boy
Slapped against my heart, for I wanted healing quick
I let you
Cut me lengthwise with such narcissistic tongue
With this new heartbreak, find me
Not wailing
Not bargaining
Just reflecting
Lesson learned, this
Motherfuckers like you come and go in waves if I let you
Grown woman, now
I heal good, so no next time
Dime a dozen, you, spy boy, and I’ve put away my pocketbook