Bad Actors

So there he was
That three-plus decades-old ghost of a love-of-my-life
Did we frolic and promise
I can’t say
Because suddenly, there he wasn’t

Did I wail, unrelenting
Did I bargain
You’re proof of said sale

Virtual man
Band-aid boy
Slapped against my heart, for I wanted healing quick

I let you
Cut me lengthwise with such narcissistic tongue

With this new heartbreak, find me
Not wailing
Not bargaining

Just reflecting
Lesson learned, this
Motherfuckers like you come and go in waves if I let you

Grown woman, now
I heal good, so no next time

Dime a dozen, you, spy boy, and I’ve put away my pocketbook

Penitent

And apologize for what

The blessings unnoticed
The love debt, outstanding
The flesh gift, unopened
The mind’s galaxy, unexamined

And the words must be uttered

I’m sorry
Forgiveness, now granted
The eyes see the fire
The resolve, reignited

Swoop

I cannot
Bring you back
Can I 
Breathe in you new life
With a breath all my own
How will I
Erase your pain
I will not

I shall not
Dishonor your story
Shall I
With my wish to the stars
Diminish your scars
How could I
Erase your name
I could not