My blessed teacher
My ego’s sworn enemy
My joy deflated
My blessed teacher
My ego’s sworn enemy
My joy deflated
Maybe your next step will be your last, but you don’t “get” to know beforehand. And instinct is absent.
The floor under your feet will tell you after the fact whether it was ever, at all, true.
And truth, it has been queried, “What is truth,” but I ask you, what is trust? What is trust?
Trust, kept buoyed by hope, took forever to fall away, and these believing eyes with it.
Expectation is only of the coming eve’ and the promise of exasperated sleep, and I praised it more than once.
One morning revealed the night had stolen the vestiges of trust, breaking free all that hope bound.
The only evidence of either, some sense of un-nameable shock. Something’d been there, but what?
Then life’s replaying of horror: The all that was and the all that’s gone. Each breath, each day, each night.
It’s Winter when he does this, so I buy myself time and find flowers somewhere. Color-filled, with thorns that draw my blood which proves I’m alive and not here to stay quiet and blind. These flowers, I cannot help but clutch them in desperate remembrance that it’s Summer somewhere. I was born in the Summer.

Artist Credit: Tiger R.; at various ages
A mistake
Maybe when I’m old, then gone, they’ll talk boldly of me
Paint word pictures of the thought I gave, the care I took
Depict the lines on my face without failing the beauty in them
Knowing I’d want them to tell my whole story of success
All of it, and how, but for them, I’d have failed abjectly
Some landfill somewhere
Carries the collateral
From our shifting wants
Undisciplined Disciple
The wax and the wane