Two Of You

Too much to bear
Lying there
By your side
Dying inside

Doubting twin
Stranger to yourself, you
Strangled, then stifled
My abundance

Magical beat-downs
Neither finger nor voice raised
Black and blue and dazed
My trust and hope, drained

Wear your lying, victim’s eyes
Cloak yourself in feigned faithfulness
Lady-friends who rescued you
Shall soon become your targets, too

Whose Site

You had good bones
Such good bones, boy

It’s that thought that found me
When you found me, boy

So I let you stay a while, sit a spell
Set a spell on me, boy

Marksman, Sharpshooter, Expert
Shoot, boy

You took aim
You took me, boy

Set your sights
But whose site is this anyway, boy

That needy, narcissistic arrow
Was not the way I needed you, boy

Still Grieving

These why-natured questions no human has answered
Nor monsters willing, either
Invade my slumber

Nightmares, demanding I wash the dishes
Become thinner and wear clothes that aren’t mis-matched
Occupy mistress status

Keep me searching

Leaving me susceptible to sages insisting
A renaissance woman now, I ought dress for my inner warrior
The muse who I let be stolen

At 3am I harken her

A ghost now, still grieving for answers from man-shaped monsters — those captains who’ve abandoned the ship
She cannot answer back

Enter Into

Wanting to look
More deep into her eyes
Wanting this thing
More than breathing

Wanting to calm
What stutter-stops his voice
Wanting to know
What does he want

Enter into conversation
She will be your song
Enter into understanding
He will prove myth wrong

Torqued

I will gift you
Machine man, me
Eyes clear now
Future-ready
Take your Soldier hand
Study, journey with you
This trip around the Sun
We familia

I will gift you
Speed demon, victory
Bodies torqued
This skin, yours
Time trials completed
Finish line, Westward
This whispered promise
We checkered-flags

I will gift you
Sugar boy, pie
Feed you tenderly
Sing to you
In perfect pitch
Make a wish
This catch-me vision
We with lights on

Watch This

God, I see You’ve been meddling in this from the start
Your majestic way

We two called upon You
We petitioned for Your peace
You answered with our miracle, praise!

Then how did his eyes stray?
Must he stroll away?

I still stand before You and my brother here
To confess the universe is wildly unpredictable, but this:

You granted love’s grace to us; and,
I do trust in You

Still Giants

If suffocation and the longest darkness remain
Be unbound, dear sister.

If shame and the fear of whispers pervade
Be as a giant, precious brother

Stay my best friend, I will stay yours, this only we will know
Feel air returning, own your height, live in peace and grow

Neverlove

Proof I wasn’t broken when we met

I loved unguarded

Neither life vest nor safety net entered into the equation of me plus you
I just trusted my breath and followed the man who’d stolen it from me

I trusted

Not knowing you couldn’t

Never expecting you’d studied me, unwilling instead to blindly follow wherever your heart might take you

I was a calculated move for you

Where did that get you but gone
And I can no longer breathe