A Gift You Didn’t Want

Do you remember the after-work nights

I’d let you lay your tawny head in my lap
Content now, at peace finally
You’d fall fast asleep, clutching my hand

The movie would roll
I’d wake you during
With an anything-but-absentminded stroke of your hair
Or after
With a simple kiss

Eagerly, I’d relay all you’d missed
Sleepily, you’d disclose you’d seen it, actually

The gentle walk to bedtime now
Tomorrow’s a busy day
The why, I reasoned
Without reaching out to my heart or my skin
You’d fall fast asleep, clutching my hand

I’d think of you there
So far over there
As my starving skin fell slowly



Morning, I, still clutching

My hand making breakfast with berries
Feeding you what felt like a gift you didn’t want

I remember the sun seemed to always shine through my door on you
As you left for the day
And for too-many days more missing you

I’d fall fast asleep, clutching your hand
In my heart
Skin screaming out at the emptiness, but the weekend was coming

Saturday! The day
You’d let me share my City
My family, my home, my sound-sleep space again
My time, my life
With you

Do you miss this?

Or was boredom all you recall?

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